Nevaeh = Heaven, spelled backwards

Tonight, I came home after another mind boggling day in the quarry to my adorable son who was in a helluva mood. He was up before 6AM, took about an hour nap, and went to the baby sitter's where he played outside, inside, and got himself even more tired than he already was. We were home for about an hour and had already had a few battles when our telephone rang.

Amber, Jacob's first mommy, as we call her now, was calling to check in on Jacob as she does every couple of weeks, and to ask us a very important question. You see, Jacob's first mommy is pregnant again with Jacob's little sister. She was advised not to have any more children after Jacob - he and his older brother put too much strain on her body to handle another pregnancy. This pregnancy isn't going very well. She is due the first week of January but they are concerned Nevaeh (baby sister) isn't growing as she should be (ultrasound on Monday to measure) and are planning to take her around Christmas. The point of my little story here...Amber called to ask us, if she didn't make it through the delivery, yes, she could very well die, if Jeremy and I would take Nevaeh, if she makes it without Amber. Amber's husband, who is Jacob's first daddy, agreed that he can't care for this baby girl himself and if she can't be with him, he wants her to be raised with her brother, and he didn't know anyone better than us to take Nevaeh. Thanks Rob, for the best compliment I have ever received in the worst possible situation.

Jeremy and I decided a while back, that life is pretty good. We have a nice home, good jobs, and an absolutely, amazing and wonderful little boy. God has been good to us. The faith I lost during our term of infertility has been restored in every peek at my sleeping child. God gave us that gift. God and only God brought him to us. Jeremy and I strongly feel, if we were to have another child, God and only God would give us that child too. I never imagined it could come to us again in this heartbreaking situation.

It's real. It's serious. It's pretty bad. It is very likely Amber won't make it. She's trying to get her things, her children in order if she doesn't. Amber couldn't give up another child. She couldn't bear that pain again. She had to go through with this. She'd rather die, than give up another child.

I pray, with all that I am and all that I have for my son to always have his first mommy in his life. I pray with all of my might, that this woman, who gave me her and my biggest treasure in life, lives to care for her children. I will pray she stays on this earth to explain with me, to our little boy, how she loved him so much that she had to give him to us for a better life than she could give to him.

Please, if you're reading this, pray for Amber and all of her children. Sure, she hasn't made all of the best decisions in her life. Sure, she hasn't done everything right. Some don't think very highly of her. I'm guilty of that too. Some say, "How could she give her child away?" What did she do that was so bad? She gave her child a home, a home with 2 parents who know there isn't anything better anywhere in this world than that little boy, a home with a huge family that loves him. After all, she did choose us!