I have so much to say lately. I feel like a social media lunatic. Tweet, status update, blog post, tweet, status update, blog post and I can't seem to stop.
I talked a little yesterday about where I want to move and go, I talked about eliminating the negatives in my life. And well, the above photo/quote popped up on my Facebook news feed yesterday afternoon. I don't believe in coincidence. I believe those things are God's way of saying "Here I am, pay attention to me!" and when he speaks, I listen.
I have worked really hard this last year to put a lot behind me. The things we all have, family issues, money issues, parenting issues, marriage issues, friend issues - whatever - just that junk we all have. I also noticed earlier this fall that I've started having panic/anxiety attacks when dealing with some people/situations. I've also realized that someone I thought needed and appreciated my help, was completely and totally taking advantage of me and my generosity. I have since closed my wallet and my mouth. I am learning to recognize these things faster/better/sooner and I'm not punishing anyone. I'm simply moving on. I have to for my health and my sanity.
I've spent a lot of time the past 10 years, being angry. There is nothing beautiful in being angry. There is no kindness in anger. There is no peace in anger. There is no joy in anger. There is no laughter in anger. I don't want to be angry. I am thankful for my husband and my child, my home, my job, my family and friends and well, I'd rather count my blessings - the things that truly matter to me, than to be angry with what is leftover.
My friend Bonnie warned me that my circle was going to get even smaller this year and it has - yet it has grown. I look at it as going back to basics. I'm trying to get to the core. To the people who have always been honest and true to me. To the people who help me build and grow myself. To the people who strengthen, nurture, and truly love me. To the people who need this in return, and will accept it from me. To the people who want to be with me for those things and not the material things they can take, trick, or connive from me. I've connected with some new people, and I'm learning to build and grow again.
I'm sending out love, light, positive thoughts and energies. I'm sending goodness and grace. Because I want those things to come back to me. I ask God to help these people who have taken advantage of me, to heal their hearts as well, because I want that for them and I want that for me.
Love this quote. I'd like this in my house somewhere, I feel like it is one that we need to read over and over, because, like you, I can get swept up in feeling of anger and it is SO not worth it.
ReplyDeleteI love how you said this year your circle has gotten smaller, yet grown. I understand that completely!