Going Home

Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there: I do not sleep
I am a thousand winds that blow
I am the diamond glints off snow
I am the sunlight on ripened grain
I am the gentle autumn's rain

Do not stand by my grave and mourn
I am the dew-flecked grass at dawn
Where tranquil oceans meet the land
I am the footprints in the sand
To guide you through the weary day
I am still here, I'll always stay

When you wake up to the morning hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight
I am the stars that shine at night
Do not stand at my grave and cry
I am not there: I did not die

I came across that poem again a few days ago. It's one of my favorites and has offered me much comfort in the losses I have experienced. It also held the answers I had been looking for.

I've been concerned about my own death for a long time, more so since Jacob came. Where to be buried - if I want to. To be cremated? Funeral? Memorial Service? Something? Nothing? I've always been terrified Edna would step in and do the big church funeral and dress me in some gaudy white girly nightgown - or worse...a pink dress, coat me in face paint, curl my hair, and then stuff me in a silver casket! If you know me, you know I'd have to be dead to let that happen. I had to figure it out for myself before I was stuck in a pink dress for eternity!

I've talked to Jeremy about my decision and he has agreed to comply. When I die, I want to go home, to the city where I was born, to Manistee. I don't want a service. I don't want a funeral. I don't want flowers. I will be cremated and I want my husband, my son, my family, and my good friends to go to First Street Beach in Manistee. I want you to walk along Lake Michigan, left of the break wall until the water meets the cliff and you can't pass without getting your feet wet, pick up some glass rocks along the way and put them in your pocket - like I always did. Look up the cliff for the old car stuck in the cement - that's the spot. Tell each other your favorite stories about me, hug Jacob, hold Jeremy's hand, read the poem above, let my body go into the breeze and know that I am where I wanted to be. Come visit me at sunset, tell your thoughts to the lake. God creates a beautiful picture there every evening. Once you see it, you'll be back to visit me again.

Reader's Digest

This story has been on my mind the past few weeks. I read it a jazillion years ago - probably in a Dentist office. For some reason, it's stuck with me.

Two women, old friends, were talking on the telephone catching up with each other. The first woman asked the second about her son's new wife. The second woman responded, "Oh, she's the laziest thing!"

The first woman fueled the conversation and asked, "what do you mean?"

"She sleeps all day. My son cooks all of the meals, does all of the dishes, he cleans the house, he does all of the laundry. She does nothing!"

"Wow!" replies the first woman, "And how is your daughter?"

"Oh, she's just wonderful! She has the best husband! He lets her sleep in every morning, he cooks for her, keeps the house really neat, and he does all of the laundry. She doesn't have to lift a finger!"

FRONT ROW

I've heard a lot of talk about this Front Row thing lately. It started when I caught a snippet while changing channels on the TV. I saw it again as an article from a religious magazine wanting me to subscribe. I had a friend mention it to me. I saw a quote from it in our church newsletter. I even had another friend who was leaving my company mention it to me on his last day at work. I couldn't take it anymore! I went on a surfing expedition to find out exactly what this whole FRONT ROW thing is all about.

FRONT ROW

Life is a theater so invite your audiences carefully. Not everyone is worthy of having a FRONT ROW seat in our lives. There are some people in your life that need to be loved from a distance. It's amazing what you can accomplish when you let go, or at least minimize your time with draining, negative, incompatible, not-going-anywhere relationships, friendships, fellowships and family!

Everyone Can't be in Your FRONT ROW

Observe the relationships around you. Pay attention to: Which ones lift and which ones lean? Which ones encourage and which ones discourage? Which ones are on a path of growth uphill and which ones are just going downhill? When you leave certain people, do you feel better or feel worse? Which ones always have drama or don't really understand, know and appreciate you and the gift that lies within you?

Everyone Can't be in Your FRONT ROW

The more you seek God and the things of God, the more you seek quality, the more you seek not just the hand of God but the face of God, the more you seek things honorable, the more you seek growth, peace of mind, love and truth around you, the easier it will become for you to decide who gets to sit in the FRONT ROW and who should be moved to the balcony of your life.

Everyone Can't be in Your FRONT ROW

You cannot change the people around you...but you can change the people you are around! Ask God for wisdom and discernment and choose wisely the people who sit in the FRONT ROW of your life. Remember that FRONT ROW seats are for special and deserving people and those who sit in your FRONT ROW should be chosen carefully.

Everyone Can't be in Your FRONT ROW

(thanks Oprah)