She hired a doofus to put new windows and new siding on her house. You know what I'm going to to tell you, huh? Yeah, you do. Edna got taken to the tune of approximately $25,000.00. The guys showed up. The did 'some' work. Shitty work. And they left!
She didn't get any estimates. He's not licensed - his wife holds the contractor's license and he 'works' under her license. Edna didn't check any references. She didn't ask any of the 5 of us kids for help. She paid most of the money up front and they kept adding little things and charging her $300 -$500 each time and she just kept writing them checks. The best part = they came door-to-door. The 'shakes' in the below picture are on the 3 peaks of the house. All 3 peaks, are different shades of gray!
We all have been pushing to get her to leave this 5 bedroom, formal living room, dining room, family room and library with 2 1/2 baths, that is bigger than mine, house for years. This project was Edna's plan to show us that she was fine and she's smarter than we are. It kinda backfired.
Her new deck. The red parts were the existing deck built when I was 3 or 4 (1976 or 1977).
There is about a 2 inch gap between the bottom ledge and the bottom of the window. This window is the only window with individual panes of glass. And, this window is the only window they ordered in the 'correct' size. All the rest are too short and they put in wood at the top to cover the difference.
Sue him, you say? For what? Can't revoke a license that he doesn't have. Can't log a complaint against his license. If he'd even show up for court, yeah, they'd issue a warrant, big deal! You can't get blood from a turnip! He'd never pay any judgement. Then too, Edna would be out the legal fees ON TOP of the repair costs! Is that worth it?
I also brought these boxes back with me. Four of them. Full of expired food. We're not talking a few months expired either. I realized I had taken all she'd let me have when I found a can of beef broth expired in March 2008 and she wouldn't let me take it. "It's only a year expired!", she said.
I also brought these boxes back with me. Four of them. Full of expired food. We're not talking a few months expired either. I realized I had taken all she'd let me have when I found a can of beef broth expired in March 2008 and she wouldn't let me take it. "It's only a year expired!", she said.
This is a jar of honey. From Edna's parents farm. Grandpa and Grandma had bees and they canned the honey. Grandpa died in 1992.
No, it's not your eyes. This cocktail sauce expired Sept-10-1986!
And this jelly in October of 1988!
Did you know that tomatoes do this to the can when they rot in the can? ME neither!
How about some antibiotic ointment that expired in 1978! Aw, why not?
I'm not sure who's going to travel this road. At some points, I think it'll be me alone. Then again, I'm sure some will be Cindy on her own. Some Karen alone. Some Gloria alone (I don't think my brother will talk to Edna through any of this - though, I'm sure he'd help behind the scenes). At other points, I think the four of us girls will be on the same road just at different intervals. One in the lead with the others lagging behind licking our wounds. I hope there will be some points where we are all at the same point but, Edna likes to turn us against each other. I hope we're strong enough to fight her without fighting ourselves.
Please, dear God, give us STRENGTH! Amen!
And this jelly in October of 1988!
Did you know that tomatoes do this to the can when they rot in the can? ME neither!
How about some antibiotic ointment that expired in 1978! Aw, why not?
So, I drove the almost 3 hours home, with this in the back of my Explorer along with 10 ton of Avon from 1964, praying the ENTIRE time that nothing would explode, to throw it all in my trash so she couldn't go back for it. I did catch her hoarding some of that Avon before I left.
At one point, sorting through this stuff out in my driveway, I started to tear and sniffle. Jeremy asked if I was okay. "You know, it's not easy taking pictures to document that your mother is losing her mind!", was my response. Though, it's been a long time coming, it was hard to admit that's what I was really up to.
I have to go back to the Avon a minute. I remembered some of that stuff from when I was a kid. I remember the coveted Avon closet that we weren't allowed to go in. There was amazing stuff in there that any little girl would want. And I did! I wanted those crayon lip glosses, the pins with the little girl perfume wax, the little lipsticks in ice cream cones, the pig in a tub soap, oh, I wanted them in the worst way! All those years, 20 years, they sat in that closet. I couldn't have them, I couldn't touch them. WTF am I going to do with them now!?! (If you're wondering, it's sitting in my home office while I watch some identical pieces on an internet auction site to see if I have anything that anyone would want.) Anyone interested in old Avon?
What's going to happen to my mother? I don't know. I guess this is my first step to document what I see and what happens. It has always been difficult (to say the least) with Edna and it's not going to get any easier. I didn't share these photos to make fun of her or to shame her. I couldn't keep it all to myself anymore. There is a long road ahead, a very long road, of figuring out where to turn with her or what to do with her and she is less than willing to take any turn at all.
At one point, sorting through this stuff out in my driveway, I started to tear and sniffle. Jeremy asked if I was okay. "You know, it's not easy taking pictures to document that your mother is losing her mind!", was my response. Though, it's been a long time coming, it was hard to admit that's what I was really up to.
I have to go back to the Avon a minute. I remembered some of that stuff from when I was a kid. I remember the coveted Avon closet that we weren't allowed to go in. There was amazing stuff in there that any little girl would want. And I did! I wanted those crayon lip glosses, the pins with the little girl perfume wax, the little lipsticks in ice cream cones, the pig in a tub soap, oh, I wanted them in the worst way! All those years, 20 years, they sat in that closet. I couldn't have them, I couldn't touch them. WTF am I going to do with them now!?! (If you're wondering, it's sitting in my home office while I watch some identical pieces on an internet auction site to see if I have anything that anyone would want.) Anyone interested in old Avon?
What's going to happen to my mother? I don't know. I guess this is my first step to document what I see and what happens. It has always been difficult (to say the least) with Edna and it's not going to get any easier. I didn't share these photos to make fun of her or to shame her. I couldn't keep it all to myself anymore. There is a long road ahead, a very long road, of figuring out where to turn with her or what to do with her and she is less than willing to take any turn at all.
I'm not sure who's going to travel this road. At some points, I think it'll be me alone. Then again, I'm sure some will be Cindy on her own. Some Karen alone. Some Gloria alone (I don't think my brother will talk to Edna through any of this - though, I'm sure he'd help behind the scenes). At other points, I think the four of us girls will be on the same road just at different intervals. One in the lead with the others lagging behind licking our wounds. I hope there will be some points where we are all at the same point but, Edna likes to turn us against each other. I hope we're strong enough to fight her without fighting ourselves.
Please, dear God, give us STRENGTH! Amen!
Yes, God, please give us strength, and wisdom, and love for each other, patience and understanding for her. Guidance. Peace. Amen.
ReplyDeleteOne more week and I will jump back in the fray....
I've been thinking about what to say. It makes me so angry to see that people take advantage of the elderly. I'm glad that my grandmother has enough wits about her that she has her "guys"...the carpenter guy, the painter guy, the plumbing guy, etc. And they're very good to her. And if they aren't available, and the issue isn't an emergency, she'll wait until her "guy" is available!
ReplyDeleteIt makes me think back to a time I took the disabled guy I take care of to the eye doctor. They had ordered some new lenses, and the lady who ordered them lost the paper she had used to trace the lenses. So, she went back in his file and used an old tracing...from a different pair of glasses. She then tried to blame it on the guy I take care of, like he had brought his glasses from 6 years ago! I was so mad, I began yelling at her in the office! Not one of my finer moments, but she was not going to take advantage of a disabled person on my watch! ARGH! (BTW, he got that pair of lenses put in his old glasses and a new pair of lenses put in his newer glasses for free!)
Anyway, I'm sorry that you've had to experience this, and it looks like your road with Edna may be getting rough in the near future. I want you to know that, as always, my thoughts and prayers are with you, Jeremy and Jacob, and your siblings!