If you don't know this about me, I'm an information gatherer. I need details. I need to read all I can so I can understand exactly what to expect, what is supposed to happen, and what can happen. When it's about my Jacob...I need to know even more.
I'm a little nervous about his tubes coming on Friday. I know it's nothing serious but, sometimes I get a little scared. It took us soooo long to get where we are now. To have a child. Almost 3 years of trying, 1 miscarriage, all the tests, and then the adoption. Sometimes, my faith slips a little and I think "God, you gave me this wonderful child, please don't take him from me!" It's always a battle for me, to let my child go experience things and get hurt, or shield him from everything to keep him safe under my wing. Somehow - if I'm there, if I'm holding him, he can't get hurt. I know it's not true and it's something I will continue to go through as long as he's my son. I'm not being silly, I'm being a mom. I know it's just tubes - I know it's not serious - I really do. It's just something that's always in the back of my mind. I hate the thought of him being in the hospital - even if it's only for a 15 minute procedure, when I can't be there with him and hold his soft, little hand, maybe more for me than for him...I guess, I don't know how to explain it...other than I just love my kid.
I've done a lot of searching on the procedure, post-op, and expectations with Jacob's tubes. I did find an advertisement - kind of...but it has a picture and the same explanation as the medical-type sites. Anyway, you can see what the procedure involves, what we're looking at while we're at the hospital, how long it will take, and what it'll be like at home for Jacob after.
We still don't have a time yet. I'll post again when we do.
After everything you've gone through to become a mommy, I think being nervous about Jacob's tubes this week is normal. Scratch that, ANY parent would be worried, so you're entitled to that plus, I don't know...seven? (Random number). :) Anyway, I can't imagine what it would be like, not being able to be there in the room with him for the actual procedure! :( I remember how emotional I got for a pretty routine procedure for myself...I think I would be ten times more worried for my child. That being said, I am praying that all will go well and according to plan, as well as for comfort and peace before, during, and afterward.
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